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Worst team names in hockey

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#1 Obi-Wan



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Posted 21 December 2010 - 06:30 PM

I've compiled a list of some really bad names for hockey teams around the planet:

Brandon Wheat Kings (WHL): Really? What the hell kind of name is that for a hockey team? I get the heritage (the original pro team) but it’s still a stupid name.

Toledo Walleye (ECHL): A walleye is a type of perch. This just sounds so silly.

Lethbridge Hurricanes (WHL): This makes no sense. Only one Hurricane has ever hit Alberta, and that was the one from North Carolina in 2006.

Frolunda Indians (SEL): This also makes no sense. There are probably no Indians (of either kind) in Sweden.

Notre Dame Fighting Irish (CCHA [NCAA]): This one is a fail because in the NCAA, fighting is not allowed.

Air Force Falcons/Bentley Falcons (AHA [NCAA]): These go together, because although calling a hockey team the Falcons is OK, when you have two teams with the same name in one conference, that's just confusing.

Montreal Junior Hockey Club (QMJHL): OK, this is true, but this team gets zero points for creativity.

USA Hockey National Team Development Program (USHL): This also is true, but can’t anyone be a little more creative?

Toronto Marlies (AHL): The name Marlies, I found, is short for Marlboros, as in the cigarettes. Way to promote cancer, Toronto!

Anaheim Ducks (NHL): Sorry, but this will always just remind me of the Disney movie. At least they’re not the Los Angeles Mighty Ducks of Anaheim, though.

Quad City Mallards (IHL): Same as with Anaheim. Ducks are generally not related to anything hockey.

Odessa Jackalopes (IHL): OK, so you couldn’t call them the Ligers once Napoleon Dynamite came out, but couldn’t you combine two cooler animals than that?

Wolfsburg Grizzly Adams (DEL): Apparently Grizzly Adams is in Germany what David Hasselhoff is in the US, so he gets a hockey team. Wow.

Traktor Chelyabinsk (KHL): Yes, that does translate to “Chelyabinsk Tractors.” Ouch.

Of course, these are just current teams. The worst name I ever heard was the AHLs Beast of New Haven. What an awful name, thank goodness they're gone.

Edited by Obi-Wan, 21 December 2010 - 06:32 PM.

#2 JLP


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Posted 23 December 2010 - 12:29 PM

Good list. Only other one that comes to mind is the Lowell Lock Monsters. Must be some local history there, but for everyone else, what the heck is a Lock Monster?

I think some European/Russian teams are named after their sponsors, which should be an automatic fail.

#3 captain_jack88


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Posted 01 February 2011 - 06:01 PM

Ok I know this isn't current, but how about Macon Whoopee? That was one awful name if you ask me, although I kinda liked the logo. Also Beast of New Haven was equally bad. And I'll throw in Lexington Men'O'War.

Current wise, I really don't like Connecticut Whale or Greenville Road Warriors.

Edited by captain_jack88, 01 February 2011 - 06:05 PM.


#4 legend-1


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Posted 01 February 2011 - 10:36 PM

I don't know if it's because Makin' Whoopee the song is so old that it slowly transitioned itself into being politically correct given newer terms to sexual references are so far worse. But to me it's still a sexual reference even if you try to tie it some bird hardly anyone's ever heard of. So I don't believe that name's even remotely appropriate for any team anywhere.

For the rest, I'm fairly sure anyone could find a reason all team names are bad. If you want to bust them on historical correctness then your going to bust almost everyone. I don't think the 1 Hurricane we've had in the past however many years justifies the title of the Hurricane state. It's just a cool name...

Edited by legend-1, 01 February 2011 - 10:51 PM.

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